Saturday 5 January 2019

The cheesiest of pick up lines.

Hey readers,

I thought for a laugh I would write a list of the worst pick up lines ever, enjoy!

8 Planets, 1 Universe, 1.735 billion people, and I end up with you.

Call me Shrek because I’m head ogre heels for you.

Do you have 11 protons? Because you’re sodium fine!

“Did you just fart? Because you blow me away!”

It’s handy that I have my library card because I’m totally checking you out.

Do you have a Band-Aid? ‘Cause I scraped my knee falling for you.

please call an ambulance your beauty I'd killing me.

I'm not a photographer, but I can picture me and you together.

If you were a vegetable you'd be a cute-cumber.

Are you an interior decorator? Because when I saw you, the entire room became beautiful.

Let me tie your shoes, cause I don't want you falling for anyone else.

Are you an omelette? Because you're making me egg-cited!

Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.

Do you have a pencil? Cause I want to erase your past and write our future.

Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material.

"Do you have an ugly boyfriend? No? Want one?"

You must be a banana because I find you a peeling.

On a scale from 1 to 10, you're a 9 and I'm the 1 you need.

You can call me Nemo because I'm never afraid to touch the butt.

I might as well call you 'Google' because you're everything I've been searching for.
Did the sun just come out or did you just smile at me?

Can I have your picture so I can show Santa what I want for Christmas?

If you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.

Can I follow you? Cause my mom told me to follow my dreams.

I value my breath so it would be nice if you didn't take it away every time you walked past.

I without you is like a nerd without braces, A shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces.

Do you want to play house with me?
You can be the front door, and I'll slam you until sunrise.

Hey girl, feel my sweater. Know what it's made of?
Boyfriend material.

You make me wanna go inside your wine cabinet and pull myself out a stiff one.

I want you to know something but I'm too scared to tell you in person. So I'll just let the first 3 words of this sentence say it for me.

Is your dad a military general? Because when you walked by, my privates snapped to attention.
If you were a triangle you'd be acute one!

Sorry, it took me so long to message, I was at Whole Foods trying to figure out what you like for breakfast.

What's a smart attractive man like myself doing without your phone number?

What is your favourite pick up line?

Cheers for reading X

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