How to deal with an autistic burnout.

Hey readers,

Some people may not be aware but I am autistic (I was diagnosed as a child with Asperger Syndrome). One of the things that a person like myself experiences is a thing called burnout. An autistic burnout can be short - as an experience of totally, exhaustion every week as I have two boys who go to school and that for me with all the social interactions is mentally exhausting. Short term burnout is what it says on the tin, I feel tired and very exhausting.

Tend not to get very motivated and just collapse on the sofa for a few hours or sleep to recover from all the mental processes because when you are autistic a lot of things are scripted (rehearsed or memories to help deal with a social situation) probably hence why can't cope with a new situation as I haven't got a coping strategy for it. I digress.

Long-term burnout is more severe in the sense of that it last longer and it can have long-term impacts such as regressing. For me sometimes when I have long-term burnout I regress, I can't cook, communicate probably or leave my home by myself (these are a few examples). It is basically I believe where I just had enough of constantly doing something over a long period and I just shut down because it is exhausting, to say the least.

So, how do I cope with burnout, well here are some ways that have helped me?

I suppose the most obvious one to help reduce the burnout feelings in to rest and you would be right. Rest is so important just to have that break to breathe and not focus on too many stimuli has really helped me. Also, keeping things simple and do things that help me relax like reading a book or listening to music.

When you have suffered a burnout you can beat yourself up especially when you have you have commitments like being a parent, you want to do your best so your build self up when you don't meet the expectations. No one is perfect and something that even now I still learning and that is it to be kind to myself.

This may help some people, it does for me but after a period after resting from burnout as I generally struggle to put my thoughts into words after the immediate event. It is ok to take your time and speak to someone if it helps you.

Like I have said previously to help rebuild your strength you have to start slowly and build from that. I have in the past wanted to go and too much which actually just sets you back further. Taking my time and doing things at a slower pace is fine. I used to be also on the go and feel that is what I had to do but mindfulness and allowing a slower pace has made a tremendous impact on my health.

Finally, writing down triggers to find out ways that help reduce or eliminate the triggering behaviour works for me. I am a bit of a sucker for a solution, sometimes we don't have a solution and that is ok, just focus on managing the situation the best you can.

Cheers for reading X

How to beat the winter blues

Hey readers,

I know it is not winter yet but it won't be long before it is here with us. The clocks have already gone back and it slowly getting darker and darker meaning that we will not get as much sunlight as we once during the summer time. The weather is getting bitter with the cold air and this can really dampen some people moods. So, here are some ways that have been useful in beating the winter blues.

Exercise. 

I know during the darker evenings there is nothing more appealing than to sit under a throw and curl up. However, one way that can stimulate them to feel good hormones such as serotonin is exercise, you can just simply watch an exercise on YouTube you don't have to leave home. This can make you feel so much better and it might you go the motivation to do more stuff around the home.

Like I have said previously one of the triggers for a decreased drop in mood is not got getting enough sunlight during the day which means less vitamin D to brighten you up. One thing you might want to consider is getting a sad lamp which helps reduce the sad feelings associated with season affective disorder (SAD). It is a lamp that mimics the daylight and the person should ideally be near it to work. It can brighten up the environment you are in and it affects the brain chemicals that are connected to your mood.

Sleep.

Sleep is so important for your physical and mental health that is why it is important you make sure you get enough. Make sure that you have a comfortable place to settle and always leave your tech in another room, less likely to get distracted and then you can 100% focus on your sleep.

Outdoors.

Another great tip is even though it will be miserable outside wrap up warm and just do it as it will be really worth it. Going outdoors some exposure to light and blow some cobwebs off too. You will feel much better after you have done it.

Eat healthier.

As lovely as it is to eat them gorgeous gluttonous food such as chocolate and carbohydrates it is important to try to be mindful of eating healthy. With the food just mentioned the thing that attracts them is the instant hit and feel good factor they produce. The downfall is that it is instance what comes up must come down. Therefore triggering a slump like a state which won't do your mind any flavours in the long run.  Try snacking on fruit such as apples and grapes that give that sweet sensation but less like to make you feel like poop after.

Windows. 

Sitting near windows whether at home or at work can help get that natural light needed to boost your mood during the winter periods.

Hobbies. 

Do something that makes you happy whether it is having a soak in the bath or going to the cinema, focusing on something enjoyable can help make you feel a lot more positive.

Cheers for reading X

Why the 90s was epic!

Hey readers,

Remember the 90s... it feels like ages ago! They were ace, didn't really think much at the time but hindsight is a valuable thing. So, here are some of the things that rocked about the 90s and not just having no responsibility for small humans and doing whatever I felt like. 

Daria was my icon during the 90s. Daria was a cartoon about an American school girl and the focus was on her life at school. She is not popular but different shall we say, she was crippled with low self-esteem and a popular sister. I loved Daria not just for sarcasm which to be fair was tremendously glorious.

MTV channel was the bomb, it was incredible unlike now where it is crap!  Of course, there were some great shows like my darling Daria, who could forget Bevis and Butthead and the amazing and slightly addictive deathmatch. That at the time was what I was hooked on watching, I am not surprised I didn't have square eyes but hey ho, I am still standing!

Of course, the 90s would not be the 90s if you haven't played the wonderful Sonic the Hedgehog on the old Sega Mega drive. I miss the carefree days when all you needed to worry about was when it was your turn to have a go and collect the golden coins.

On telly when I was in the 90s there was a brilliant game show called Supermarket sweep and it involved Dale Winton as the host. The contestants had to answer questions to earn time to dash around the supermarket. Then the contestants had to run around and get as many high-value products into their shopping trolley within the time frame given wins.

I am now officially old because I can say this, if you are a youngster then you may not have heard of a thing called a cassette tape. A cassette tape according to Dictionary.com

Also called cassette tape. a compact case containing a length of magnetic tape that runs between two small reels: used for recording or playback of audio or video in a tape recorder, cassette deck, video camera, or VCR, and for storage of data by some small computer systems.

You can get music already on the tape but you can also record it. In the 90s I spent a large portion of a Sunday afternoon recording the certain songs I liked whilst listening to Radio 1 top 40. It turned into a mixtape of my favorite hits. I put so much work into making them start and stop within the time, such beautiful concentration was made.

Reflecting back from the 90s I vividly remember glaring into a Where's Walley book and trying to find this random man dressed in a red and white striped hat and t-shirt lost in a picture full of themes such as on the beach, it provided hours of entertainment for me.

When I was a youth in the 90s the best place to get clobber was from a store called Tammy Girl with such items as a skirt over trousers or peddle pushers.

After you had been shopping at Tammy Girl the place to hit was the pick n mix in Woolworths where there was so much choice it took a good half an hour to make your selections.

Flip out pencil case was my whole life when I was a child at school. It was amazing and the best piece of stationary that I have ever and I mean EVER owned. If you have not been fortunate to experience a flip out pencil case then you are missing out.

Cheers for reading X

10 ways to save money on your energy bills.

Hey readers,

It is January and we are all looking for ways to save money, One expense that costs a lost is electricity below, so let me tell you some tips on how to save money on your energy bills.

1. Thermostat.

A simple way to cut down the cost of your energy bill is to simply turn down your thermostat by 1c can save up to £75 per year.

2. Layers.

When you feel cold don't instantly whack the old heating up but put an extra layer on with jumpers, socks, dressing gown etc. Even having throws can help a great deal.

3. Warm drinks.

Another way to stay warm is to have a warm drink can help you feel instantly warm.

4. Appliances.

If your not using appliances turn it off and even turn the tv off at the mains. Don't have lights on if someone is not in the room it is a total waste and can save you a lot of energy.

5. Washing.

When you are doing your clothes washing it is a good idea to change the temperature down 10 degrees for example from a 40 to a 30c can make a huge difference on your bill and could potentially save up to £52 per year.

6. Draught proof.

Did you know a cold draught can cause you to lose heat and money so it is important to get your home draught proof because it can be easy to just think to turn the temperature up especially in old homes? A thing that you can consider doing in your home is draught excluders and investing in draught proofing kits.

If you don't have double glazing them you can get plastic trimming to go around your window to stop the draught coming in and keep the warmth in the room.

Line your letterbox and if you have a chimney that is not in use then seal that up like that can easily save you £25 per year.

7. Hot food.

Don't put hot food into the fridge or freezer straight away as it messes up with the temperature of the fridge, it is better to give the food time first to cool down and then store it in the fridge or freezer.

8. Shower.

Instead of hitting the bath first swap over to the shower and try to make your showers no longer than 10 minutes as this will reduce the amount of heated water that you use.

9. Hot water.

Check the boiler on the temperature that your hot water is at and think about trying to reduce it just by one degree will make a massive difference to reducing the energy you use.

10. Turn off.

Make sure that if you don't use a room regularly to turn down the radiator and make sure that doors are closed and curtains/blinds are drawn in the evenings to keep the heat in and room toasty.

What methods do you use to help with reducing your energy bill?

Cheers for reading X

9 no spend activity ideas.

Hey readers,

Sometimes, I like the challenge where I go for the weekend without spending a penny and survive at the other end. I do love a good challenge - I know the whole buzz surrounding no spending is popular with the 30-day challenge or even dare to push it to go a whole year. I like the fact you can alter it to suit you, so for me, two days of no spending at all whereas others go 30 days but have a budget on certain items such as food.

Anyhow, I thought I would put together some ideas on how to have fun without spending a penny, so let's crack, shall we?!

1. Board games.

Board games are great if you have to knock them around as they are a fun family activity to do together, kills some time and is free, result.

2. YouTube.

Oh, faithful YouTube you come to us in our of need, so much free stuff from vlogs, music and even films there is plenty you can watch for nothing.

3. Exercise.

You don't need a gym membership to do exercise, oh no there is plenty of ways to join in the fun. There are exercise videos on YouTube, there is a couch to 5k app to encourage you to build up your stamina over the weeks with little goals to practice to run. You can even just put your trainers on and go for a walk.

4. Blog.

Come on I can not forget to mention blogging now can I? You can easily set up a blog and there are many free platforms to chose from. you can write about anything when it comes to blogging, the world really is your oyster and it creates a way to unleash your creative side.

5. Library.

The library is a wonderful place and is one of my favourite things to do. There are so many varieties of books you can get on loan to read at home for free. There are classes as well from learning IT to colouring in again free and it gets you at your home.

6. Walk.

Go check out your local park or walk to a different part of town. There are free museums likely where you live you can wander around and explore.

7. Local events.

Most places have a local council that tells you if there are any events locally to where you live. They tend to be free and it is a great way to have some fun when you are on a budget.

8. Clean.

If you have spare time to kill then something love to do is have a good old clean whether it is cleaning the shower or the oven it will be worth it at the end when it is all nice and shiny.

9. Lists.

Planning is a great way of constructive using your free time and it could potentially help save you money. A great list to do is a meal planner for the week so you know what you need and you can stay on budget.

What non-spend activities do you enjoy doing?

Cheers for reading X

Why does laughing help with depression.

Hey readers,

I have suffered from depression for a number of years and one of the ways to reduce the pain I guess could call it that would be to turn to humour. I have a dark sense of humour so laughing and relatable situations really do help me.

So, why are the reasons that humour helps depression, well let's get exploring shall we?

First, of when you laugh, it releases the natural feel-good chemicals like dopamine which help your brain feel happy. Whilst the brain is receiving the message that you feel good it has a knock on response to the physiological responses in your body; where you breath slower and your muscles relax making you feel instantly much better at that moment in time. 

When you laugh your whole body relaxes - which releases tension and stress. Not only that but after the release of tension the muscles can feel relaxed for up to 45 minutes apparently. 

When you are caught up in laughter you are not focusing on the depression, because you can only deal with one emotion at one time. The more you focus on happy thoughts the better change it is to trick your mind into believing in them feelings. 

When you feel more relaxed through laughter via humour it can help clear your mind and think better. It can help stop worrying and give your mind that much-needed rest. 

Research has found people who watch funny videos are more like to have an increase in cortisol, dopamine and other hormones that are increased and causing pathways (the communication messages to the brain to relax and generally feel good). 

What is even better about laughter at the moment there is no negative response and that it is a habit that can enhance your overall well being.

Cheers for reading X 

The best car journey games for kids.

Hey readers,

As parents, we all know it can be a right pain to entertain children on a long car journey. So, here are some suggestions of games that you can play whilst in the car.

Eye spy with my little eye.

Firstly, I have chosen a classic gamed called eye spy with my little eye and then you have to find something that you can see and say the letter. The other people in the car than have to guess an answer that has the same letter that is asked of.

Car bingo.

For this game, you will need bingo sheets and pen. Now on the internet, you can find loads of different car bingo sheets to print off. It is a fun thing to do and try to get all the pictures on your sheet. The first person who shouts bingo wins. It is a good idea to remember to pack them pens mind, haha.

Nursery rhymes/sing-along songs.

A great idea is to purchase a cd with classic nursery rhymes or songs (This is more for the younger child) so that you all can sing along to old-time classes such as Humpty Dumpy or old McDonald had a farm, who doesn't love a good sing song.

Subject matter.

A brilliant game to help children talk about certain topics is this one where you pick a certain subject and they have a minute or two to talk about that chosen topic. This game is a useful tool to help communication and learn discussion skills. It doesn't matter what the subject is on as long as the speaker is interested and knows what it always helps a great deal.

Quiet.

This one is for any parent who needs some quiet time and that is the game where you can see who is the quietest. The person who stays the quiet the longest wins. It is as simple as that.

Word association.

This game is where you pick a word and the other players have to pick words that are associated with it. The person with the highest answers linked to the word wins.

Shopping game.

This game is fantastic for the old memory. What you have to do is start off with the first person saying, “I went to the shop and I brought…” and the have to choose something being with the letter A. Then the next person has to say the last answer and then pick something begging with B. That continues till all the letters have been chosen.

No - yes game.

This game is taken from the classic game show Take Your Pick. What you have to do is ask questions to a person and that person cannot answer with yes or no then they are out of the game.

Would you rather.

Another super-duper game that goes down well with kids is a question-based game where you ask a person an ultimatum such as… Would you rather lick the bottom of your shoe or eat your boogers? You can make up the questions about anything but if you have young children they love anything to do with pooping or farting goes down a treat.

Cheers for reading X