6 Ways To Make You Feel More Happier.

Hey readers, 

We all get in a funk from time to time and it can be a struggle to breakdown that negative cycle. So, here are my top 6 ways to help shift your mood to a more happier one. 

1. Distractions. 

It can be hard to get out of snapping out of the negativity because you are constantly feeding it with your thoughts. 

It can be an automatic response to when you feel rubbish to focus on the negatives. That is why sometimes I have found that instead of trying to come up with a solution to the problem use distractions to take my mind off the negative feelings works well.  

Distractions give you something to focus on other than the situation you are in and can help breakdown the negative cycle. It doesn't have to be something big it could be as a simple as walking to the shop buying a newspaper and reading it on a bench. 

2. Breathing. 

A good idea is to take five minutes to lie down somewhere that is quiet and where you won't be distracted with noise etc. 

This allows you that time to focus on breathing. Breathing is brilliant especially with feelings of anxiety and worry. Focusing on using all your diaphragm and lungs is key so you allow your body to adjust and find equilibrium after experiencing a fight or flight response. 

3. Write down. 

Write down how you are feeling on paper. You don't have to worry about spelling but just write free-flowing off the cuff. This can help get your words down and understand more clearly how you feel instead of constantly having the thoughts swimming around in your head. 

4. Thoughts. 

It is so easy when you have low self-esteem to constantly be one's own worst enemy and drag yourself down. Be mindful of what you say to yourself. For example, instead of saying to yourself, 'your crap and won't get the job' swap by saying a positive response to a situation, 'I did my best and that is all that counts, what will be will be'. 

It is so important for your mental health to work on yourself (trust me I know as have had low self-esteem for a number of years and can totally understand how bloody hard work it is). Nevertheless, you can make positive steps forward and I am a big believer of baby steps.  

5. Sleep. 

Sleep is so important in helping clear your head and making sensible decisions. Sleep helps with regulating your emotions. 

I think we have all been there when a tiny thing can cause an irrational response when we are overtired. 

A good tip to invest in is to make sure you turn off electrics an hour before bed and watching or reading something that is calming can really be helpful for settling your mind. 

6. Exercise. 

Exercise is not everything however it can be of benefit with triggering positive hormones such as endorphins that give you that feel-good feeling. You don't even have to go to the gym, you can simply go for a walk for 20 minutes. All these little things add up and have an impact on your mental health. 

What ways help put you in a more happier mood? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below. 

Cheers for reading X 

My Sunday photo 18/08/2019

Maybe

Hey readers,

I have Asperger's Syndrome, a mild form of autism (though to me it is not mild and it is present every day in my life).

Though there are so many areas to discuss autism today I am going to focus on one thing that affects me and causes great distress at the moment.

 That is the word 'maybe', which by the way I hate it and I hate it in relation to a response to a question. It is covered in grey and makes me stressed, especially when it is a response to a question which I want a definite answer (which 90% of the time).

You see as an autistic person I like control, I like to know what is happening. I love routine it comforts me. Sometimes I admit I get too rigid that I get struck and obsessive making my health deteriorate.

 One of the reasons is because I like black and white, I don't like the murky waters of the unknown. I never have, I feel it is innate and my body responds instantly. 

I can remember as a young child-hating change and uncertainty. I had carers who seemed unpredictable which is not great if you have an autistic mind like myself you get very confused as to what is happening. 

 I was on edge not knowing how someone would respond. I had night terrors because of the fear. That is just one example.

Maybe I will, maybe I won't? but why can't I have a yes or a no? Often, I didn't care, either way, I was more focused on the answer to be certain. I don't like guessing games, I like certainty.

I don't know really what is the point to the point of this post, I just wanted to get it off my chest because right now I am dealing with maybe which quite frankly is most infuriating.

Cheers for reading X

27 things you take for granted before you became a mum

Hey readers,

Sometimes as a mum, you don't get much reward (I am not complaining because this is the life I wanted). However, you never really appreciate your life before you have children until you have children.

Here is a list of some of the kind of things you took for granted before you became a mummy.

1) A lie-in.

2) Going shopping by yourself.

3) Being spontaneous.

4) Only responsible for yourself.

5) Not having to read the same book over and over again.

6) Quietness.

7) Pee in peace.

8) Not having to share anything, haha.

9) Having an adult conversation.

10) You never knew what Peppa Pig was.

11) Having a conversation.

12) Not having to read yourself.

13) Hot drink.

14) Not having your clothes smeared in snot.

15) A Goodnight sleep.

16) Being ill and not doing anything.

17) Reading a book.

18) Having a tidy home.

19) Peace of mind.

20) Running errands without every five minutes having a small human ask are we going home yet.

21) Having a shower.

22) Not being late.

23) Having nice furniture.

24) Personal space.

25) Time.

26) Energy.

27) eating in a restaurant.

Cheers for reading X

34 things to do when sad

Hey readers,

I suffer from depression and sometimes it can be easy to get stuck in feeding into the negative thoughts. What I sometimes find helpful is to stop and do something productive. 

So I have written a list of helpful things (also I go to when complete forget everything).

1.  Read a newspaper.

2. Colour in.

3. Meditation.

4. Go for coffee.

5. Practice handwriting.

6. Go to the shop and buy a magazine.

7. Read a book.

8. Clean (wash up, hoover, put clothes away etc).

9. Shower.

10. Take a walk.

11. Doodle.

12. Mind map - blog ideas etc.

13. A hot cup of tea.

14. Wear a chunky jumper.

15. Cook a recipe.

16. Brush hair/plait hair.

17. Watch mindful videos.

18. Watch something funny.

19. Write some poetry.

20. Play with clay - get creative.

21. Take some photos.

22. Paint nails.

23. Sing a song.

24. Dance your heart out.

25. Walkthrough woodlands.

26. Watch the sun setting.

28. Stroke a furry animal.

30. Light a candle.

31. Watch clouds.

32. Deep breathing.

33. Squeeze a stress ball.

34. Write down three positive things in your life.

Is there something you enjoy that is a great distraction? Love to hear your comments in the comment section. 

Cheers for reading X

My Sunday photo 11/08/2019

The struggle is within

Hey readers,

I don't often discuss my parenting issues in relation to my autism, mainly because I am embarrassed and quite frankly ashamed.

I am going to be straight up and honest and say that I struggle with this parenting thing. 

Let's be more specific as I am aware that actually, I am good at some bits. 

Depression would argue but that it is the truth. However, the one area I do struggle with is mainly with my boys and trying to entertain him for long periods. 

I feel guilty if I can't entertain my children but stuck in a dilemma where I can't concentrate on people for long periods of time, it totally exhausted me. 

I am also an introvert so therefore need time alone to store back my energy. I find interacting exhausting as a lot of the time I am thinking beforehand about how to communicate.

 The times when I am not thinking are when I am being impulsive due to anxiety therefore not censoring and not always saying the right. 

Not really rude, just random and repetitive. Kinda overlaps with ADHD/OCD traits I have learned. I don't have ADHD but with Aspergers there many overlapping traits from other conditions that are apparent. I digress (a major trait of mine right there).

I find it hard to entertain as there are many thought processes that occur and that is tiring. 9 times out of 10 after ten minutes of play I am exhausted mentally.

 I need to do nothing and shut down as I have used all my energy up focusing on that one action that takes many different social rules.

I think one area that is really tough for like me as an autistic living in a technological world (though most of the time it is the dream) I do get sucked into the whole idea of perfect parenting with this idea that you have to entertain your children all the time.

I am one of the few or many not many other autistic people have spoken out in actually I do care what people think and I am very aware of me. 

I am not dissing autistic people that don't give a dame, in actual fact, I admire you and wish I was bloody like that, hell it would so liberating. But I have not reached that acceptance of me.

I wish I could just be laid back, but it seems I am a worrier and feel that because I am an autistic parent I need to make up for my inadequacies.

Cheers for reading X