The benefits of being in a relationship.

Hey readers,

I have been with my husband for over ten years so have had some experience of what it is like to be in a relationship with someone. So I thought I would focus on the positives today and tell you the benefits of being in a relationship with someone.

One of the biggest things for me is that you have someone to talk to who can understand where you are coming from have someone to talk to you. You know that they are committed and willing to take the good and the bad so you don't have to feel a burden. It is like a commitment you make once your in a relationship because you want the best for that someone and it works the other way as well. Sometimes you are going through bad stuff and they are lifting you up and other times you are being their pillar of strength.

If you are in a long term relationship with a person then one of the most wonderful and liberating things about being in a relationship is that you can be yourself, you can take off the mask. You can be yourself and don't have to put on a front, because you know that they like you just the way you are.  I think there is something special when you are in a relationship where each other can be authentic especially when you go further in committing with one another and decide to live together - during that period you learn a lot about each other.

Having a partner means that you have a cheerleader that has your back and will provide moral support during the good times and bad times. They will pick you up, they pat you on the back and they will provide them with words of encouragement.

I have had periods in my life where I have dated, and though it can be exciting to get to know someone new it can also bring the stress of finding a good person that you want to spend your life reduces stress not having to deal with a new relationship.

With being in a long term relationship that is healthy can help longevity and can help you grown as a person with the nurture and support from a partner.

One of the biggest things I enjoy is having lighthearted moments where my husband makes me laugh, to have someone who can get you and have a similar sense of humour makes it all worth it.

With spending time with someone you can make them special memories that money can't buy you but you can cherish them and put a smile on your face.  Being able to experience something special with some is lovely because you are not alone in the experience and can relive the memories together.

As a person with a disability, it can be frustrating to be in a relationship for both sides but it also means you can learn from each other and help each other get a better quality of life.

Cheers for reading X

9 ways to calm your imagination at bedtime

Hey readers,

Do you struggle with settling to go to sleep before bed, your mind is racing with thoughts that won't switch off. Below I have provided some tips to help with a conundrum to get some sleep instead of staying away thinking.

1. Routine.

I know it is the same old story but routine really does help you get into a rhythm with trying your brain to behave in a certain way. Create a time you want to go to bed and do things that help you sleep.

2. Reading.

If you need some downtime and to stop going in circles with your thoughts at night then I suggest giving reading a go. It helps calm the mind, makes you sleepy and you can focus on the story rather than your million and one thoughts that pop into your head.

3. TV.

Try to avoid the really heavy stuff that provokes an emotional reaction such as the news or horror films. You need to unwind before bed and one of the best ways is to watch something light-hearted. I think comedy is a great way to relax.

4. Music.

If TV is not your thing then another way to relax is to listen to music or there are plenty of relaxation videos you can get free on YouTube that you can shut your eyes and follow step by step. Again like reading this allows you to focus on the instructions and create calming thoughts into your head which in turn will provide you with the calmness to settle for bed and sleep.

5. Yoga.

Alternatively, to the relaxation videos, you can try light yoga to do before bed. Stretches the muscles can help get you to sleep quicker. by working on the muscles and getting them ready to stretch out and relax.

6. Story.

Sometimes, when I struggle to drift off to sleep I create a story in my mind to give me something to think off and it helps a lot. I think about the situation and the feelings. It doesn't have to be fictional sometimes go back to when I was a child and think of the special moments and what it felt like such as the evening sun and playing outside. It involves happy thoughts and really helps get me to sleep.

7. Light.

Having low light when your watching TV say can create a relaxing ambience to get you in that sleepy mood and ready for bed. Having a warm lamp or fairy lights are great accessories to purchase and help in the long term with your sleep.

8. PMR.

Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) is a technique to help you relax your body. You scan through each muscle of the body tensing and released the tension. Being consciously aware of this can help get the body to relax but that is key is to have as little stress physically in order to settle off to sleep.

9. List.

Having a notebook by the bed is useful because if you have lots of thoughts that are stopping you getting sleep writing them down can clear the mind. It will stop the thoughts circling and can know that it can get dealt with tomorrow as it is written down you won't forget about it.

Cheers for reading X

5 winter activities to do with children

Hey readers,

It is winter now and it can be quite tricky to think of things to do with children when it is so cold and wet. So, I have treated you to some activity ideas that my children love and maybe yours might too. 

1. Nature walk.

Fairly simple idea get the coats and wellies on for a walk in the great outdoors. This is a great opportunity to let little ones explore and they love it as well. Especially if they're like used logs on the floor to climb on. Another great tip is to print out a nature checklist and this keeps them busy searching for things like leaves and squirrels. My kids love ticking off the items of the list and searching for things because it is exciting for home. 

2. Slow motion video. 

If you have a feature on your phone that allows you to record videos in  slow-motion option to (or you can simply download an app if not) then a good idea is to record when it

 is raining or snowing or anything like that through your window

 as it makes a great little video and something productive for the kids to do. 

3. Paint snow. 

When it is snowing get a bottle and fill it up with water, add a few drops of colouring. Then go outside and paint the snow, such a clever idea and it makes the snow very colourful ***though advise not to eat yellow snow ;)***

4. Cookies. 

Kids love helping and being little mini people that is why cookies are great for getting kids to bake in the kitchen, plus they have some yummy treats after. 

5. Movie Time. 

Get them throws, grab some popcorn and put a film on. I love to do this when it is great and meh outside and just chill out with cuddles and a film.

What activities do you like to do with your children? 

Cheers for reading X 

My Sunday Photo 13/01/2019

5 ways on how to eat mindfully.

Hey readers, 

I have had issues with my relationship for a long time and I have slowly been working hard to have a better grip on how I respond to food. One way in which I work on is a thing called mindfulness eating. 

What is mindfulness eating? 

In simple terms instead of rushing my food down me, I am consciously aware of my food and taking in all the feelings and sensations I great when I eat which means it makes me feel fuller for longer and I can enjoy eating instead of it being a chore. 

There are many different ways to do mindful eating and I am to explore them below.

1. Stop. 

I think because when I was growing up it was common practice to eat ALL your food of your plate because if you didn't it would be a waste and people seem more frugal when I was younger anyway. Even though I now know this is not a good practice to participate in. It is more important to listen to your body and stop when you feel full rather than just eating for the sake of eating. 

2. Listening. 

One of the techniques I have adapted with mindful eating is listening to your body and eating something when your stomach rumbles or your feeling faint because your blood sugar is low. It is ok to eat when you want, you don't have to eat junk food either it can be something small and satisfy like a piece of fruit or some yoghurt. Also, getting out of the bad habit of eating your emotions - this is something I have struggled with, whether it be good or bad times food is there as a way to deal with the emotions. Now I try other techniques such as going for a walk or buying a book I want when I want to celebrate something I want to achieve, 

3. Eating together. 

I am a binge eater though I am getting better it is working progress. A characteristic of binge eaters is eating alone, secretly and rushing the good down my gob without even thinking about it. Now, I try to eat with people or when I do have a binge do it outside with people - amazing how you don't rush around others. 

4. Diet.

At the end of the day food is fuel and getting the right nutrients is key in giving you that energy to feel better. It is better to eat a variety of food then just food that is comforting and being restricted. Eating meats, vegetables and some protein is all the way forward. 

5. Sit Down. 

I am guilty of rushing about, eating on the go and just doing something else whilst eating. A good habit is to sit down, take your time and focus on just at the moment eating the food, making sure it is chewed enough and enjoying the flavours. It is a lot more enjoyable eating food this way and adapting to a slower pace. You feel better for it after and if you take the time to eat slower you reduce the risks of getting indigestion.

Cheers for reading X 

4 ways to help Seasonal Affective Disorder

Hey readers,

The days are so gloomy and dark that they can really influence your mood and impact your day. During the winter months, a lot of people experience a seasonal condition called Seasonal Affective Disorder.

What is a Seasonal Affective Disorder?

It is a condition that happens during the dark, cold short days and the long nights during Winter. When you experience not a lot of light it can really suck all your energy out of you. Suffers have also expressed feels of lethargic, low libido and restless sleep.

There is a theory to support Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) when the light goes into the eyes it can react to the hormones in your body which affects your mood. Hence why people feel much more cheerful when the sun comes out to play.
Another theory is that suffers from SAD when experiencing lack of daylight and shorter days will produce higher levels of melatonin which makes them feel lethargic

One in 15 people in the UK is known to suffer from SAD.

Of course, if you are feeling depressed then the first port of call would be to go and speak to your GP to get the right professional support needed to tackling SAD.

Tips to help SAD.

1. SAD lamps.

You probably have seen Sad lamps that specialise in producing a lamp that mimics daylight. 

Apparently having the light that feels like outdoor light has been able to help suffers from SAD feel better.

These light boxes are aimed to help with light therapy were the individual sitting in front of the light for 30 minutes say will help them feel better in their body and mind with having exposure to light during the winter months.

There is a variety of light boxes now on the market and there are even ones that can work with your alarm clock that gradually build light into the room making it much more manageable to get up in the dark winter mornings.

2. Diet.

Food is energy and it is important to have the right food for keeping your energy levels high. Reduce the amount of sugar in your diet and opt for fish, fruit and vegetables.

3. Vitamin supplements.

People who suffer from SAD have reported that taking vitamin B12 and vitamin D has also helped with their mood.

4. Outdoors.

Sometimes going outdoors even though it is cold can do wonders for your mood.

It is a great way of getting some exercise in and blowing the cobwebs off.

Wrap up warm and see the beauty that nature has to offer. 

Incorporating 30 minutes exercise a day can help produce the feel-good chemicals such as serotonin so it will enhance your mood. Going outdoors will also allow you to get the natural outdoor light as well as an added benefit for exercising outdoors.

What things help you beat the winter blues?

Cheers for reading X

10 things that make me happy right now.

Hey readers,

January is a funny old month, it can be a bit miserable and a wet month where you skint and a bit fatter. so I thought to cheer myself up I am going to write about currently things that make me happy during the January month.

1. This Christmas I got my favourite presents which is my beloved rainbow and glitter lava lamp which I love dearly. Not only is my lava lamp really pretty but it helps me calm me down when I am having a meltdown because of my autism. I love watching the glitter as it is so calming the way the glitter swirls around.

2. I am so grateful for routine especially after Christmas and new year holiday where everything seems to go out the window and can be a bit much. Routine helps give me that calmness and order that makes me feel safe and less anxious.

3. even though it is cold and bleugh I enjoy winter walks where the frost is twinkling on the floor and you get a cold nose. u like being in the open and helps my mental health a lot. not to mention it burns off kids excessive energy that they have.

4. photograph helps give me focus and allows me to dip into my creative side. I enjoy experimenting and learning through trial and error. photography gets me excited and looking for something fun that captures my eye.

5. during the colder months I love nothing and better then to snuggle in my head with my heated blanket on full blast. especially we. you look out of the window and it is all grey, this is the ultimate cosy for me.

6. I do love a good old book to get lost in. I partial to a psychological thriller because the suspense keeps me going and wanting to read more.

7. I love cups of tea during winter, there is just something lovely about wrapping your hands around a hot brew and breathing in the warmth from the stream.

8. Cuddles from my boys and the fact that they love me even though I am flawed they see the good in me. To have that love unconditional is a gift in its self especially when I am feeling sad I hold on to that love a little bit harder.

9. Hot showers are bliss especially when you have burning red skin. When you go out in the cold and it takes you ages to get warm to then have that shower to warm you all over is bliss. Followed by getting to my warm pyjamas is heavenly for me, it is the small things really.

10. Finally, my last favourite thing I have been enjoying in January is throws and I am really fluffy and soft. I love snuggling down in the evening, the only downfall is that I don't want to anything other than veg out.

What kind of things tickles your pickle in January? I would love to hear your thoughts.

Cheers for reading X