Monday, 21 December 2020

49 things you say as a parent.

Hey readers,
Pre-children I made a conscious vow not to say certain catchphrases or be a certain type of mum.
Bur moving forward in time to me being a mummy I can't help but say certain sentences, several times a day.

49 things you say as a parent.

1. Please be nice to each other.

2. Please be quiet, mummy is trying to talk. 

3. It's not the end of the world.

4. You should be lucky not living in Africa or whatever equally depressing place inspires you to try to make the little sods eat their dinner.

5. If you don't do X then I am going to tell your daddy and you are going to be in serious trouble.

6. Go and play with your toys and give mummy some headspace.
7. What was his poo like, soft/wet)firm etc 💩 

8. Put your willy away no one wants to see it.

9. When I was your age I..... 

10. Because I said so, end of!

11. Just you wait and see. 

12. No pudding unless you eat your dinner. 

13. If someone asked you to jump off the cliff would you?

14. I've told you a thousand times.

15. Say pardon, not what!

16. What did your last slave die off?

17. It will all end in tears.

18. You will take someone's eye out with that.

19. I want, never gets. 

20. Don't sit that close to the tv, you will get square eyes. 

21. What part of no do you not understand. 

22. Your hands are not broke. 

23. No one said life was fair. 

24. Naked is not an outfit. 

25. When I was young we never had...

26. Who is the parent you or me?

27. Money doesn't grow on trees.

28. If you don't pick up your toys, I'm going throw them away. 

29. Go and ask your dad (or mum). 

30. I've had it up to here with you. 

31. If you want to act like a child, I will treat you like one. 

32. Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer. 

33. One day you will thank me.

34. Quiet down, I can't even hear myself think. 

35. Are your legs broken?

36. Let's play the quiet game.

37. I'm not asking, I'm telling.

38. When you have kids, I hope they are just like you.

39. Don't you use that tone with me, mister.

40. Stop crying or ill give you something to cry about. 

41. You better wipe that look of your face. 

42. Youll understand when you are a parent. 

43. I wasn't born yesterday you know. 

44. You kids will be the death of me. 

45. I'll wash out your mouth with soap. 

46. You've brought this on your self.

47. Youll live. 

48. Talking to you is like talking to a brick wall. 

49. I am going to count to three...

Do you recognise any of these phrases that you say now that you are a parent? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below. 

Cheers for reading X


  1. hahaha! There was so much I had planned on never saying before kids but that soon went out of the window. lol
    I think my favourite is "go and ask your dad" and I know I have said all of these things apart from Put your willy away no one wants to see it. I have two girls. lol x