Challengi

Hey readers,

Hope you are well. My word of the week would be:

 

Challenging

 

This is because I have been challenged with getting out of my comfort zone and practising positive steps to become more confident and help improve my behaviour. I have autism (as you probably well aware) but one of my downfalls is communication particularly when asking for help such as asking on the bus where such and such stops at. Or when I am in a shop asking if they have a certain thing in stock.
Also, building my confidence by going in public areas where my social anxiety is heightened. I have a key worker now who helps try and progress with goals that I made to achieve.
However, my anxiety has been high due to the start of this intervention which I accept is natural but it has an affect on my patience and parenting. And sometimes I struggle when say my son had a meltdown when he is overly tired. But hopefully with time I can be a better mummy and be a bit more relaxed.
Thanks for reading XX

Rain

Hey readers,

 

My word of the week is:

 

Rain

 

 

I don't know what has happened this week but this wet weather has been a right royal pain in the arse!
It is so much more hard work when you cooped up indoors trying to entertain two toddlers. Especially as I feel terrible in saying no to my DS1 every time he asks to go to the park. Our local park as been redeveloped therefore he is obsessed. But so far we have only been once as it ridiculously wet to go.

 I would love to just fall asleep whilst watching a movie snuggled under the blanket Fat change of that! Instead got caught up in the rain looking a drowned rat whilst trying to tame my two year old troublesome toddler who really is testing his boundaries at the moment.

But at least I get to use up some of the arts crafts I have stocked up on in an emergency.

Another bonus of it being a November is the fact all new comedy dvds are out. Meaning that I have something decent to watch and help destress. I can not recommend Alan Carr Yap Yap Yap tour, so funny had mecin stitches!

Hope you have a  good week.

 

Cheers for reading X

 

FTMOB 15/11/2015

Hey readers,

1. The last week and a half my DS2 has started nursery and already his language has improved. He now loves coping tytms to sings that they sing such as Wheels on The Bus.
2. My eldest when having his bath after dinner says to me, #look ast hjid tummy it looks so big". Which tyo be fair it did, haha!S
3. So my son said to me today when playing with his small Minion Kinder Egg toy, "mummy he is flying home". I ask, " which way is his home?" And my son replies, "he going that way (indicating left), no mummy this way (turning instantly right).
4. My son is fixated on Fireman Sam and repeatedly recently my DS1 has said to me, " mummy when I grow up I want to be a fireman".
5. When my husband lifts my sons above his head he makes the eating noise and my son says, "I've eaten your hair all up daddy that is why we are bauld now". 
6. My DS2 has now officially said, " mummy". I don't know weather I should celebrate this milestone or dread hoiw much I will hear it ;)

 

Cheers for reading X

FTMOB - 02/11/2015

Hey readers,
Hope you enjoyed the half term, its be a former of a week with insightful chats from my eldest. My youngest is started go make a lot different sound shapes sothat is positive.
Anyhow here are few installments of chat from le boys.

1. My eldest watched me dress in the morning and rather euthastically pointed at my chest and says, "boobieeeees". Thank God it is not said in public!
2.  My eldest informed me this week he likes buses, voom voom cars, police cars, parks...interesting!
3. Watching Thomas this morning both boys together put their arms up and repeated choo choo train like they do on the telly!
4. Currently near where I live you can see a building being demolished and my son calls the machine that pulls the building apart a " munching machine#.
5. My youngest has now adopted the word "why" and I bet it is from copying his older brother.
6. My eldest is fascinated by our first aid kit and comments, "that is where the plasters are and adult medicine lives".
7. Every time my son seems anything he wants he replies, " I want one of them " or "I want that for my birthday".
8. My eldest enlighting me by telling me that he is growing and he will grow into an adult and therefore he can do the washing up and cooking like mummy and daddy.
9. We walked past some older children playing on a field a football match and my son says, " I want to that when I am older and then I will win ".
10. When we got out of the car my eldest said to me, " careful mummy the exhaust is very hot. You must not touch it or you will get burnt".

 

 

Cheers for reading X

Noise

Hey readers,
My word of the week is:

 

Noise

I chose the word noise as I have a lot of.internal chatter going on. However, I feel so good not having to run around like a headless chicken this week with not having to drop and pick up my son from nursery. It is lovely to see my son not so tired from nursery and not going to speech therapy this week. It gave my son the time to spend with his brother and just generally chill out.
The downfall of not being so structured and having less time is falling back on blog admin. I am the type of person to feel  guilty with not catching up on comments, commenting on linkies and so for. I don't know why I just think I am too conscientious at times and put too much pressure on myself. I am like that with everything though, if someone wants me to do something I immediately jump up like lightening to do it.  So, I feel guilty when I have been a bit slow, but it is silly really. I am sure I am not alone but I tend to over analyse like I am now and I really hate that about my personality. But sometimes it can come in handy, so really swings in roundabouts.
Anyhow I will be looking forward to carving our pumpkins as I love arts and craft type stuff with the sproglets. So happy Halloween readers and hope you have some spooktacular fun ;)

Cheers for reading X

First Child Vs Second Child

Hey readers,

I am writing this post to tell you my experience of what it is like to have a first and second baby and the differences between them. Trust me no child is the same but also you are neither the same. As experience and life shape, you and we are always moving forward whether we like it or not it, fact!

I digress, Here is my top ten list of the differences of having a first and second child.

 

1. When I first had my baby boy I was a nervous wreck about everything. My anxiety was flying off the radar. The change was so overwhelming and the feeling of not being in control because I have never done this whole parent business before emerged. I wanted to be perfect but I learnt fast that was an unrealistic expectation and unreachable! The second baby was a bit more relaxed (I always have anxiety) but felt more aware and knowledgeable second time round. Didn't fear labour as most of my fear first time round was based around the unknown.

2. First-time child  I could pay attention wholly on my darling and was a lot easier to have a focus on one child. Second time round was intense and very difficult for me as I am not good at multi-tasking. I am autistic I Iike to pay attention to one thing at one time. Trust me with an inquisitive and excitable toddler that ain't going happen. My two year old was mental with energy and was bouncing all over the place therefore found it very challenging. I think for both of us in reflection was a difficult transactional period. Now two years on I love it more as my boys are friends sometimes and my youngest can copy my eldest. His speech is better and faster and picks up on things from his brother.

3. My eldest had one cold in a two year period. Then he attended school and has a several cold/flu type illnesses. Whereas my second has had several illnesses pre school years old due to my eldest sharing his lovely germs.

4. With the first baby time was a lot more readily available therefore it was easier going out shopping and the like. Soon as the second one came along it was very, very stressful and struggle for me to manage when out and about. OK, lot easier now my son has kissed goodbye to the buggy for good. I don't have to worry about crashing the double buggy everywhere and running over peoples as much now! It is more manageable now though still don't do it frequently with two together as I get meltdowns due to being autistic. Luckily I am in a place where I don't have to worry too much about having to take them both out at the time. Like I said previously I really struggle to multi-task and then add social situations I am diabolical. Second time round I have less time to focus on each boy. However, I have to manage a routine after time and have adapted within my means. I am very lucky that my eldest picked up potty training in a week and that includes at night. So when it is nappy changing I just focus on including my son as a little helper so he doesn't feel left out.

5. With my first child I learnt the hard way with to make sure that everything was out of reach as soon as he could walk. In contrast, the second child is a breeze with safety as I had prior experience with it and already got a lot of safety features in the home.

6. When I was weaning my first child I was advised to baby-led weaning which as typical me I took as Gospel. I went to the group and followed the rules to the book. The downfall was I took everything literal therefore when they said the child had to use their hand I did just that. I didn't use any utensils as they said they had to experiment and learn for themselves. Being autistic common sense lacks and finding a medium ground is something that I fail badly with. No one explains instructions clearly therefore I find these periods of learning extremely stressful and it can really get me down. 

Second time around with weaning  I said fuck the rules and the stress. With weaning the first time round taught me to do with what I wanted to do. OK, the child was more compliant which made it a hell of a lot easier but I was more relaxed and I believe that influences parenting experience for all. 

7. When I had my first child I sterilised everything and had a panic attack if the lid of the bottle fell on the fall. Compare this to the second where the three-second rule applies right?! My thoughts are germs will help build his immune system and playing in mud is part of sensory play right ;)

8. As a new mum you want to try EVERYthing and get so absorbed in trying to be a perfect mother so therefore.o attended the dreaded baby group. The most boring thing in the world was attended by the groups. They nearly killed me with the stress of it and the social situations. I just found them so boring and the chat well was beyond tedious. I am just not one of the mums and certainly prefer structure play and not to be around small talk. Second time round I attended the baby groups and decided enough was enough. I am going to go to a dance group and the library group as I enjoy them as they are structured and love stories and songs over messy play ;) the pressure is not on so much and feels much more laidback about the issues around making sure my baby interacts properly. He has an older sibling so he is not going miss out. lol. 

9. When settling my eldest to sleep we cuddled him to sleep and then put him into his cot. where he would sleep soundly most through the night. In sharp contrast with having two children we put them together in their own bed in the same room and often leave them to get on with it. As they share a bedroom this impacted on them. Once we dropped the side of the cot for my youngest he would not settle at first. This impacted both my boys sleep settling as my youngest found it at first a novelty. So we had to stay there sitting with both boys fell asleep. However, one would wake up and crawl into the others bed. Normally my youngest as he is very affectionate and they would most of the time sleep together in one bed cramped together. Now, though it is more of a morning ritual for the boys to cuddle in bed at least us parents can have five minutes of peace before the mayhem begins.

10. When documenting baby's development you covered it and monitored intensely compared to the second child and you have some prints hitten away. But at least with the second time around you are not on tenterhooks as you know roughly what to expect. The major valuable lesson is that each child is different and will do what they want in their own time. Even if it is not what you expected most time you will find a way of muddling through.

 

Cheers for reading X

Happy

Hey readers,

My word of the week is

Happy

Knowing that we are coming to a half term and a breakis well needed here. I break from the mayhem of getting the my little boy to nursery is making me want to punch the air . I didn't think it be so tiring picking up and dropping off.but then for someone who struggles socially and the fact that their is no social order with people wondering everywhere Inn the building causes me to panic. Put anxiety is very high knowing I have to go in the building each day and face the chaos to not have to think about it for a week sounds amazingly blissful.
 I think that I am not the exception everyone in our household could do with a break and chill out. Everyone seems a bit more tired especially me and I  am not looking forward to the clocks going back. Though I do like the darkness and candle light. God I feel old when all I think about is sleep.I have two important meetings next week and so a break just to get through them would help my autistic mind.l and.my aching bones.
I am finding it difficult with lots of new things happening that this October break with less pressure will do me the world.

Cheers for reading X