Why are kids....

Hey readers, 

Kids are still a mystery even after 10 years into motherhood my boys still have the ability to amaze me.

Why do kids produce so much snot, it just constantly streaming and if you think that is bad they wipe it on their sleeve and smear it all over their face or if you are really lucky they may share it with you, Ewww!

Why do kids have an issue with sitting on their bottoms and constantly have ants in their pants? Why can they never sit down correctly for example when I was at the bus stop the other day waiting for the bus my eldest did everything he could to not sit his bum on the seat. 

Why are kids more of a hindrance than a help with housework? I know we are meant to be encouraging this behaviour and I am grateful that they are willing to help but between you and me it is a right pain at times with taking extra time and not doing it correctly. 

Why do kids always have sticky fingers? and they get everywhere including my phone, the bathroom mirror, and all over the TV for goodness sake!

Why do kids always find talking about their wellies so funny, seriously it is not that funny so please stop now! I was glad to move on from the talk about poo but now as they have gotten older and going to school everyone is talking about penises, it is like a novelty. After hearing the jokes about them for the 5858495 time it really does get tedious. 

When my boys are not talking about penises they are constantly twerking. Then the friends come round and they all twerk. Then go to school and again they are twerking. Why is it so hilarious shaking your bum in the air? I don't get it!

Why do kids always have to be in a rush with everything? Even getting a pint of milk down the local shop, they do a bolt down the aisle like it some Olympic sport. however, in constant the only time they go into slow motion is when we need to get to school or when it is bedtime, funny that!

Why do kids always bounce on you first thing in the sodding morning when you are like a zombie and then for extra loveliness decide to lick your face, why????

Why do kids ALWAYS do the fucking complete opposite of what you wish for, it is like they go out of their way to be an arse to you.

Why do kids lie so blatantly obvious, "mummy I haven't eaten chocolate," they say whilst looking at you with chocolate smeared all over their chops. Or when you sit there and literally watch what they do with your own eyes and they still deny it, do they think I am thick or something. 

Am I missing something or is it something you can relate to? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below. 

Cheers for reading X