30 jokes to get you smiling for New Year 2021.
Thursday, 31 December 2020
Hey readers,
It is a bit depressing at the moment with the whole of 75% of the UK in Tier 4 (including me boo!). SO let's take moment to smile and have a laugh with 30 of these New Year jokes, enjoy!
1. Where can you go to practice maths at new year's eve? Times square.
2. What is a New Year's resolution? Something that goes in one year and out the other.
3. What do snowmen like to do on New Year’s Eve? Chill out.
4. What did the ghost say on January 1st? Happy Boo Year.
5. What’s a digital camera’s New Year’s resolution? 1080p.
6. "I promise not to make any bad jokes for the rest of the year." — A dad on New Year's Eve.
7. If 2020 was a person, I'd sue him for pain, suffering and lose of wages.
8. May all your troubles last as long as your New Year resolutions.
9. Where can you find comedians on New Year's Eve? Waiting for the punchline.
10. What was 6 afraid of 9 on New Year's Eve? Because 9 ate 7.
11. I love it when they drop the ball in Times Square... It reminds me of what I did all year.
12. My resolutions was to read more so I put the subtitles on the TV.
13. Knock knock? who is there? Abby? Abby who? Abby New Year.
14. My New Year's resolution is to be more optimistic by keeping my cup half-full with either rum, vodka or whiskey.
15. Don’t shoplift a calendar or you’ll get twelve months.
16. My resolution was to lose some weight, so I got a divorce and I’m feeling much lighter.
17. Why shouldn’t you start jogging on New Year’s? You’ll spill your beverage
18. What’s a couch potato’s New Year’s resolution? To cancel their gym membership from last year.
19. What do cats say on January 1st? Happy Mew Year
20.What does the baker do on New Year’s Eve? He gets ready for a toast.
21. Dracula is famous for his “count down.
22. What did the barista say in January? Happy brew year.
23. What did the New Year’s champagne bottle say to its father? “Pop!”
24. What do you say when saying goodbye on New Year’s Eve? See you next year!
25. What do you call always wanting a date for New Year’s Eve? Social Security.
26. New Year? I just got used to this last one!
27. Not to brag, but I already have a date for New Year’s Eve. December 31st.
28. My new year's resolution was to finally lose 50 pounds. It's going alright! 3 weeks in and I've only got 55 left to lose.
29. My internet is slow but hopefully this posts quickly...HAPPY NEW YEAR! Have a great 2021!
30. My new year’s resolution is to procrastinate. But I will wait till tomorrow to start.
Happy New Year lets hope 2021 is a lot better than 2020!
Cheers for reading X
How to celebrate New Year's at home.
Wednesday, 30 December 2020
Hey readers,
We all know it is Corona time which sadly has affected us all during the festive period.
It is New Year's Eve on Friday and though you can't celebrate it like normal party style or go to the pub. That doesn't mean you need to stop any kind of New Year's celebration.
This year is all about making the best out of a situation at home so below I have some ideas on how to celebrate the New Year at home.
1. Decorations.
Why not decorate your home with New Year decorations to create a feel-good atmosphere. There is plenty of fun with things like 2021 ballons and banners.
2. Dress up.
Just because you are at home doesn't mean you can't still make the effort and get dressed up in nice clothing to make you feel better to celebrate the New Year.
3. Host a virtual party online.
Thank goodness for the internet during corona times. There are so many choices from zoom to google meet up where you can come together with family and friends to celebrate the New Year. You could be even brave and do a quiz :)
4. Games.
Get some games out for some family fun and way to kill some of the time until 12 pm. Monopoly or bingo is a popular choice.
5. Film.
For a low key feel why not put a film and set the vibe with candles to settle down for a relaxing New Years Eve.
6. Bubbly.
Get a bottle of bubbly to pop when the clock strikes midnight is a fun way to see the New Year.
7. Takeaway.
You can't really go to a restaurant as most people are now in tier three or tier four so why not treat yo self with a takeaway. Plus if you a new member to Deliveroo you can get free delivery.
8. Sparklers/fireworks.
Why not go out with a bang with a firework display at home. If you're not feeling that confident with fireworks a simpler solution is good old sparklers. It is a nice way to do something different on New Year's Eve at home.
Are you celebrating New Year's Eve at home and if so how? I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below.
Cheers for reading X
Barbie is a k**b!
Monday, 28 December 2020
Hey readers,
I will be honest with you here I think Barbie is a k**b and she is not a very good role model for youngsters. I have stated my reasons below
⬇⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇ ⬇
1. She is so vain, all she seems to care about is what she looks like. Given girls, this warped up the sense that to get anywhere in life in order to be popular you have to be pretty.
2. Barbie has unrealistic expectations around body image. She makes out that you can be or do anything you want as long as you are blonde, tall and skinny. To me, this sends out a negative message and can cause anxiety. Let's not forget the dodgy ratio which us so ridiculous it is laughable.
3. She is so sexualised and it is about looking sexy with the short clothing, heals and tits out, come on let girls be girls, childhood is short-lived so let them just have fun and be innocent.
4. Barbie does not look her age, she is 57 years old people and in real life properly would have some serious surgery to keep her youthful looks.
5. Her feet are not designed for heels 👠 which is a bit weird anyway. Let's face it flat shoes rule, fuck you beauty standards.
6. Barbie dolls make out they are thick and have little intelligence. Let's look at an example; Mattel brought out a book which features Barbie in it called I Can Be A Computer Engineer. Which portrayed Barbie as lacking the skills to know what the hell is happening and a need to constantly rely on male classmates for help.
7. She thinks she is perfect in everything but this bollocks as we all know that perfection is NEVER going to happen as it does not exist!
8. She is materialistic and all she cares about is buying clothes, cars and having a good time. Shouldn't we be teaching kids deeper stuff instead of money makes the world go round?
9. She has weird body ratios that are mind-boggling. Her neck is super long. Her legs are longer than her arms by 50% compared to normal average women only being 20%. Her 16-inch waist would leave only room for the liver and a few inches of intestines. You get the idea of just a few examples I provided.
So yeah, Barbie sucks and OK dolls are for imaginary play so, therefore, some leeway. But there is a Barbie programme now sadly which I have sat through.
All I get from this programme is how pretty I am and look at me. This clearer is being televised for young viewers to watch which as they are clearly venerable at that cage with getting sucked in the message of these stupid ideas.
It can have psychological effects with anxiety and self-consciousness with who you. So, even though Barbie may come across as an innocent toy be very careful of the subtle messages she sends out.
What do you think about Barbie? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below.
Cheers for reading X
How to deal with Twixmas
Saturday, 26 December 2020
Hey readers,
Christmas day is finished and there is that air of waiting for somerthing... the NEW YEAR but them few days after Christmas and before new year are called Twixmas.
It can be a funny time as you don't really have anything structured during the festive period. It feels like limbo so here are a few things you can do inbetween waiting for the new year to arrive.
1. Have a clear out.
With having sosme presents now would be a good idea to have a clean out and declutter of unwanted items.
You can then donate them if they srill have life or if you want to earn a few quid sell them on ebay.
2. Go for a walk.
It is hard of things to do during Covid times but you can also rely on an old faithful walk, even if it is to see the lights in your local neibourhood. You are getting out of the home and fresh air is not just good for you physically but mentally as well.
3. Clean your home.
Now is a good time to crack on down and clean the home out and give it a fresh feel after all the fedtive fun.
4. Go shopping in the sales.
If your feeling adventerous and got some spare money now would be good time to check out the sales and grab a bargain (if you need it).
5. Read a book.
Nothing beats curling up with a book espeically when it is so bleak outside, perfect escapism.
6. Try out a new recipe.
Got some spare time? why not try out a new recipe that you like.
7. Catch up on some christmas specials.
There is something for everyone on the telly so why not catch up on any chrsitmas specials that you enjoy, wehich reminds me I need to catch up on Motherland ;)
8. Homework.
If you have chuldren catch up on any homework that needs to be completed.
With spare time means you can crack on getting any unwatnted homework done at a leaisurely pace without leaving the homework to last minute dot com.
9. Routine.
As an autisitc perosn I love rountine ans so do a lot of other people.
It can be helpgul to just simply get up ge dressed and have some order in your life to feel produvtive, it can make you feel less slugglish and more motivsated.
10. Set some goals.
If your feeling brave and motivbsted why not set some goals that you might want to work towards and achieve.
Hope this helps and tell me what are you doing during this funny old twixmas time?
Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below.
Cheers for reading X
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