Hey readers,
Masculinity has been under the microscope lately.
From social media debates to academic papers, everyone has an opinion on whether masculinity, whatever that means to them, is a force for good, evil, or something in between.
Or are we just tripping over our own definitions and assumptions? Let’s unpack this.
First off, what even is masculinity?
It’s tricky to pin down because it’s not a monolith.
To some, it’s strength, stoicism, and providing for others.
To others, it’s aggression, dominance, or that guy who won’t stop flexing in the gym mirror.
Historically, masculinity has been tied to roles of hunter, warrior, and breadwinner shaped by survival and societal needs.
But today, with those roles less rigid, the concept feels like it is in flux.
So when we ask if masculinity is "bad," we’re really asking about a moving target.
The critique of masculinity often zeroes in on its worst expressions.
Think of the bully who picks fights to prove a point or the boss who steamrolls everyone because he thinks vulnerability is weakness.
These behaviours, aggression, suppression of emotion, and entitlement get labelled "toxic masculinity," and for a good reason.
They hurt people.
Studies, like those from the American Psychological Association, have linked certain masculine norms to mental health struggles, violence, and even shorter life expectancies for men.
If masculinity demands you bottle up your feelings until you explode, that’s a problem.
But here’s the rub: is that *masculinity*, or just a warped version of it?
Critics argue it’s not the trait itself but the distortion like how a hammer can build a house or smash a window.
Strength can protect a family; stoicism can steady a crisis.
The same qualities that get vilified in one context can be heroic in another.
A firefighter rushing into a burning building isn’t "toxic" for being brave or physically dominant.
Context matters and that’s where the conversation gets messy.
On the flip side, some say masculinity’s traditional framework is outdated, period.
In a world where physical strength isn’t the currency it once was, clinging to old ideals can feel like forcing a square peg into a round hole.
Feminist thinkers like bell hooks have argued that patriarchal systems often tied to masculinity oppress both men and women by locking them into rigid roles.
Men are told to "man up," to suppress tears or fear, and that pressure can breed resentment or isolation.
If masculinity demands you never ask for help, it’s no wonder some guys end up lost.
Yet, there’s pushback. Plenty of people, men and women alike, see masculinity as a positive, even essential, part of human diversity.
They point to traits like courage, leadership, and resilience as not just useful but be channelled right.
Jordan Peterson, love him or hate him, has built a following arguing that masculinity isn’t the problem aimlessness is.
He’d say a man without purpose can turn destructive, but give him a noble goal, and those same "masculine" traits become a gift.
It’s a perspective that resonates with a lot of guys who feel attacked just for existing as they are.
So, is the badness baked into masculinity itself?
Biology might offer a clue. Men, on average, have higher testosterone levels, which can amp up aggression and risk-taking.
Evolutionary psychologists might argue that’s why men have historically been the warriors and hunters it’s wiring, not just culture.
But here’s the kicker:
Women can be aggressive too, and men can be nurturing.
Hormones nudge us, but they don’t dictate us.
If masculinity were inherently bad, wouldn’t every man be a walking disaster? Most aren’t.
Culture plays a bigger role than we might think.
In some societies, masculinity looks like quiet dignity; in others, it’s loud bravado.
The Viking berserker and the samurai poet were both "masculine" in the they were, but they’re night and day.
Today, pop culture feeds us extreme superheroes or deadbeat dads with little in between.
Social media doesn’t help, amplifying the loudest voices that either demonise masculinity or double down on its worst stereotypes.
It’s no wonder we’re confused.
Maybe the real issue isn’t masculinity but how we judge it.
We’re quick to slap "toxic" on anything that doesn’t fit a modern, softened ideal.
Emotional openness is greatly vital, even but does every man have to cry on command to be "healthy"?
Some guys process pain through action, not words, and that’s not inherently wrong.
Meanwhile, traits we praise in women, like assertiveness, get eyed suspiciously in men.
There’s a double standard lurking here, and it’s worth calling out.
Data backs up the complexity.
The World Health Organisation notes men die by suicide at far higher rates than women globally often tied to that pressure to "hold it together."
Yet men also dominate fields like engineering and emergency services, roles that lean on traits we’d call masculine.
Good and bad coexist; it’s not a zero-sum game.
The question is whether we can separate the wheat from the chaff without torching the whole field.
Personally, I think masculinity isn’t inherently anything good, bad, or otherwise.
It’s a toolbox. Pick up a wrench and you can fix a car or chuck it at someone’s head.
The outcome depends on the user, not the tool.
Blaming masculinity for society’s ills is like blaming a car for a drunk driver it sidesteps the real issue: choice.
And choice cuts both ways. Men can choose to dominate or uplift, just like anyone else.
Where does that leave us?
Maybe instead of asking if masculinity is bad, we should ask what we want it to be.
If it’s just a relic to dismantle, we risk alienating half the population.
If it’s a blank slate, we can redefine it, keep the good, and ditch the junk.
Some advocate for "healthy masculinity," blending strength with empathy, but even that assumes there’s a "right" way to be a man.
I’m not sure there is. People are too varied for one-size-fits-all.
In the end, masculinity isn’t a villain or a saint it’s a human thing, flawed and flexible.
Calling it inherently bad oversimplifies a story as old as time.
We’d do better to judge actions, not identities, and let men (and everyone) figure out who they are without a script.
The world’s messy enough without turning a trait into a scapegoat.
What do you think can we rewrite masculinity, or should we just let it breathe?
Cheers for reading X
