Small spaces and autism

Hey readers,

When it comes to small spaces and my autism in some instances I like to be in small spaces. Other times small spaces make me feel really claustrophobic making me feel like I  want to run away and be free. 

Therefore in this post, I'm going to split up for reasons why I like small spaces and reasons why I don't small spaces. 

So why do I love small spaces as an autistic person? 

I think one of the reasons I like small spaces, in particular, is when I'm having a meltdown I feel like I need to curl up in a fetal position. I want to hide away in a small space where no one can get me that is dark and secure and safe.

 I identify my bedroom as my safe place and that is where I go to escape the emotional situation that can cause me to a breakdown of sorts. 

when I am in a small space I find that there are fewer stimuli for me to concentrate on. Therefore it calms me down a lot more quickly than when I am in a very stimulating environment where there is a lot going on. The type of stimuli that affects me is noise from the TV, bright lights, someone touching me. So, shutting out that noise helps calm me down and dispenses the meltdown. 

When I go into a small space it helps me to stop the overthinking and fast thoughts that occur in my mind. Small spaces give me a chance to reduce my feelings of being overwhelmed and trying to process this information when I'm deeply anxious. 

when I am in a small space it's normally deep within a quilt on a quilt on a quilt so that I am warm and secure in my small space. The small space and being closed in helps me feel safe again.  

Looking back and evaluating how I respond to small spaces I think one of the reasons that I see small spaces at times positive for me because they are comforting when I'm distress or when I'm anxious. Going to a safe and small space gives me that time to hideaway. 

Reasons why I do not like small spaces? 

I guess like most things the way I think about things is black or white and this the small spaces. Sometimes I deeply enjoy them and other times I detest them, there is no in-between for me. 

I don't like small spaces when I am in a busy place or I am not coping well with my anxiety. I feel trapped and find it hard to think of solutions, therefore, have felt that this is going to be forever. 

I need to feel in control and when I am not it causes upsets and meltdowns. Another time I don't like small spaces is at bus stops waiting for the bus. 

I feel really paranoid when there are others provided the space. I have been knowing to stand in the pouring rain because I don't like the entrapment. 

Cheers for reading X

Sensory autism wish list.

Hey readers,

I am autistic (if you didn't know, I just put it out there!). One thing that helps me is some sensory depending on what the item is. I find sensory items really beneficial and can be a real comfort especially when I am feeling really anxious. So, here are some products that if I had the money I would definitely buy them, till then I just wish for them.

1. Weighted blankets.

Can't start without mentioning the ever popular their ever so popular weighted blanket. I love the feeling of heavy material (I sleep most nights with a quilt, a throw and two sleeping bags, I sh*t you not). I just feel secure when I feel that entrapment on my body, I feel like I am in my own little bubble, especially when I am going through a meltdown a weighted blanket would benefit me a lot. I picked this one because it looked well made. The fabric looks super soft and comforting.

2. Sensory light explosion prism.

I respond very well to low, soft lighting. I am very hypersensitive to lights so it works for me. I really love this sensory light explosion, it looks amazing and the colours are subtle which I appreciate a lot. I don't like really bright lights as they trigger headaches and make me quite stressed due to the sensory of it. This explosion light is 3D and it also changes colour. This light would be a great distraction especially when I go through obsessive thinking and it could help calm me down when I am anxious.

3. Massage Mat.

Basically, this item is a massage mat with Five 12v motors inside a padded mat. Choose different combinations of speeds with the hand-held controller. I like the idea that you can control the strength and there are different settings depending on performance. Personally, I am not a fan of soft tough so I would 100% be hitting the hardest speed because I respond well to really strong and firm movements.

4. Large liquid filled sensory floor tiles.

Now if you have even been to a soft play then you may have come across these sensory floor tiles. I have been lucky too and love them. I think they are amazing to play with, lovely colour arrangement and just all round great tactile product.

5. Giant bubble tube.

I have wanted a bubble tube for so long now. I think they are stunning with colour movement and so calming. They would really help especially if you had a sensory room (that would be the dream right there). The tube has different soothing colours along with bubbles to relax anyone. It absolutely transfixes me for hours as I love light shows to calm me when I am hypo anxiety and would definitely benefit along with my eldest - which  I could imagine both of us together sitting watching it.

Cheers for reading X