Observations of what happens in a heatwave

Hey readers,

 Have you noticed that it is a tat on the hot side, yep, me too and I am terribly British in which I love a good moan about the weather. 

So let's look at my accurate portray of what it is like to experience going through a heatwave.

You know you are going through a heatwave when every sentence, every hour of the day is announcing to anyone who is listening, 'It's hot'.  Because no one obviously has noticed that big yellow ball in the sky.

You go bat shit crazy in the supermarket for multi-packs of ice lollies like your life depends on it.

You love your fan like a family member.

Never has a cold shower felt so good until your child decides to walk in on you and declare you have a hole.

You get beyond frustrated at stupid questions asked by children about who is the smelliest when really all that matters right now is trying to concentrate on cramming as may ice cubes as possible into your cup.

You worry your bladder may explode because you have drank your weight in cold drinks in just one day.

Your pillow has never felt so pumped then during this heatwave with constantly turning over the pillow at night.

You suddenly become a raging manic woman over the tiniest of things because you fuse has finally blown and throwing wet pants on mummy's head tips her right over that edge.

The dreaded bedtime you have to do. The ultimate question, should or should you not open the windows? Where the bedroom is like a fucking sauna and outside is just noise from people constantly revving and horn beeping timed just around the bedtime hour. 
Don't they know these people outside having fun at bedtime hour makes this mama very, very angry?

You pine for autumn so hard, please bring it back, because I don't know if I can cope with any more under boob sweat.

 Do you like the heatwave? Or like me too much sun makes me go a bit crazy? Love to hear your thoughts in the comments section down below.

Cheers for reading X

Gummy bear show, but why oh why?!

Hey readers,

if you have small children then you have been sure to be have had the privilege of having to hear the gummy bear song.

 If you haven't heard of it then I beg you do not Google it or else you will never erase that memory from your mind.

Well, my youngest absolutely loves the gummy bear song, it is dame awful. It involves the popular American sweet a gummy bear, bright green bear singing a dreadful song called I'm a gummy bear, yes I am a gummy bear.

Now if that is not bad enough, the producers go further and milk it for all its worth and have only gone and done a blinking show, called the Gummibar and friends. It is wrong and traumatic to have to sit and listen to it.

It is full of nasally singing, bright colours in the show and al the way through it is none stop singing. I need to wear glasses to watch it. 

The story is so silly and I quite like to punch the gummy bear in the face truth be told.

I just hate it, it is a crap storyline and clearly milking it for all it's worth.

 Ok, fair enough you have to earn the doh but you killing me slowly with getting my son hooked on it and that is all he ever wants to watch now. FML!

I just want to point out that Gummy bear really needs to invest in some bigger pants as every shot when he is wiggling his butt I see his crack, it is not attractive and he is constantly dancing or singing, which is so painful to my poor little ears and eyes.

One final thought, the song is attractive and a total earworm, whether I want it going round and round it appears I am these days permanently singing it.

Rant OVER!!!

Cheers for reading X

Chocolate chip cookie recipe

Hey readers,

Looking for a fun recipe for a six-year then you need to try this chocolate chip cookie.

Ingredients.

* 15g of Chocolate chip cookies or chocolate.

*100g Brown Sugar.

* 1 egg.

* 125 unsalted butter.

* 225g self-raising flour.

* 1/2 tsp of salt.

* 1 1/2 tsp of Vanilla extract/essence.

Method.

1. Preheat oven 200c.

2. Put the butter and sugar into a bowl and mix well.

3. Add the egg and vanilla extract/essence.

3. Sieve the flour and salt and mix into the mixture.

4. Add the chocolate chips and mix in. Then roll the mixtures into a ball and place on to a tray with parchment paper.

 Make sure there is plenty of space between the cookies as they expand when baking.

5. Place the cookies in the oven and cook for about 7-10 minutes.

6. When you take the cookies out leave them on a cooling rack for about five minutes before eating them.

Cheers for reading X

My Sunday Photo 09/08/2020

Fat girl's problems in the heat

Hey readers,

Cor it's hot, isn't it! I am sweating all over with my fat. I don't know anyone else but I am a fat girl and hot weather is not cool with me.

Let me enlighten you in this post with all my problem problems with being fat in the heat.

1) Shopping.

Going around shopping in Primark in the ridiculously overheated building with people trying to grab a bargain and your crack is sweating, sad times 😂 😅

2) Wash.

  Every time I come home from going out in the sunshine I need a shower as I am drenched from head to toe in sweat, forget a cold drink I need the cool water drip all over my body.

3) Clothing.

 Because it is hot you don't wear a lot of clothes and you have to deal with the dilemma of being roasting with layers or haul saying F**k it and get your Wobbly arms out on full display.

4) Chub rub.

Every fat girl's nightmare that is chub rub. If you have never heard of this term it is basically where your thighs rub together due to sweating and cause a fiction which later turns into a burn, joy!

5) Staying indoors. 

Toying constantly with the idea of just being a vampire and stating hidden indoors with the blinds down all day long because going out in the boiling sunshine is a challenge in its self which makes you totally miserable. So, what is the point of being miserable and hot when you can stay at home and get through a ton of ice lollies in the shade?

6) Shower.

 Feeling you may as well live in the shower to cool down with the constant amount of sweating that I do during the summertime. 

Do you suffer in the heat? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section down below. 

Cheers for reading X

Impossible

It's impossible,

Impossible to live,

Impassive to hide

Impossible to do anything right.

Lost

I've lost my way,

I'm alone,

Sitting in the dark,

With no words to be found.