A to Z of mental health

Hey readers,

I love good old A to Z and though as a person who has mental health issues and is interested in mental health I thought I  would do a list of  A to Z of all things mental health. So here goes...

A - antidepressants because it does help and makes a huge difference to help give you some space to think. 

B - body image is a critical player at times when it comes to the way you feel whether positive or negative. 

C - change is something you have to do to help you get better in a mental state.

D - depression because it is something that happens to a lot of people and it isn't just the feeling of a bit down. At times it can make you want to kill yourself. It is a fight that you have to battle with.

E - emotions because they are the things that trigger a response to the environment and the thoughts in your head. 

F - flight of ideas refers to a  person experiencing a flight of ideas may be extremely excited or anxious. Flight of ideas itself is not a mental health condition but can be a symptom of one. People with bipolar who are experiencing mania may exhibit flight of ideas. Mania can feel like being sped up, and manic people may jump from idea to idea.

G - gardening can be a therapeutic activity to give you something to distract your mind and relax. It has really positive benefits on mental health.

H - housing conditions which are poor or lacking help with everyday things like sorting out bills can be detrimental to someone with mental health problems.

I - isolation is a common feeling amongst people with mental health problems. I myself have at times feeling isolated and sense of not longing which can make your worse on top of your own mental health issues that you have to do with. 

J - juggling constantly to find the right balance to help you and your mental health. Whether it be a balance of diet, getting enough and not too much sleep. 

K - keep in shape is really beneficial to help with mental health. Not only does it help if you get side effects of weight gain from medication but it can also boost your mood. 

L - loneliness because it can be so lonely when your going through hell and trying to fight that battle every day.

M - medication is a lifesaver for me anyway. Of course, it doesn't radiant the problem but allows you to think clearer and that break from the constant pulling down feeling you get. 

N - negativity sadly often comes along when you feel crap it can be hard to see any light. 

O - oppression through society and judgment. 

P - paranoia can be experienced with some mental health conditions. I have it regularly and it can be very distressing and can feel very real at the time something that I am still working on. 

Q - quiet because sometimes you feel somber and don't have to the energy to communicate. Other times you need time to reflect and be quietness around you. 

R - regression because at times you shift back to old behaviour and vice versa. I feel that is important when it comes to mental health to mindful and conscious of changes in behaviour to help put strategies in place for when a bad badge occurs. 

S - self-care is vital to help with improving how you feel and getting your needs met. 

T - time because nothing comes instant and you have to work bloody hard to make progress when it comes to mental health.

U - upheaval because that is how it feels when I go through a bad spell of depression. 

V - vital to get the right support whether it is medication, seeking counseling or volunteering this call help towards a better hold of managing your mental health.

W - worry because it is partnered with mental health conditions such as anxiety, OCD etc. 

X - xenophobia can affect someone who is mistreated due to coming from another country or being discriminated in terms of where the individual is from. E.g. studies have show doctors more likely to diagnose immigrants with schizophrenia conditions compared to citizens of the UK for example.

 This, in turn, can affect massively on the individual with getting the wrong treatment and the quality of life. 

Y -yearning, and grief because losing someone you love to death is hard and it is a process that takes time to heal. 

Z - zestiest affects mental health and the way that current theories influence what kind of treatment one would receive. For instance, nowadays cognitive behaviour therapy is the thing that seems successful with treatment to some mental health conditions. Compared to the 50s where electroconvulsive biological theories favoured at the time where electronic shoots.

This is where seizures are electronically induced in patients to relieve some of the psychological stress caused to them by their mental health condition. 

Cheers for reading X

My Sunday photo 25/08/2019

How to slow down in your life.

Hey readers,

Let's face it life in this technological world can be very fast-paced that can be difficult to stop, think and appreciate what you have around you. I have come up with my favorite top ways to help you slow down and just be present at the moment.

Do Less.

I for one struggle at times with this idea that I need to be on the go all the time. However, I am slowly wising up to the fact that sometimes you just need to do less. 

I have found that in actual fact, in the long run, this will affect overall production because you are getting the rest and not working yourself into the ground. My theory that I try to follow is slow and steady wins the race.

Be present. 

Sometimes we can get lost whether through stress or obsessing something that is good to get into the habit of checking in. This is where on the spot just stop and focus on the environment around you, you will be amazed how good you feel when you get into this habit. 

Do nothing for 10 minutes. 

I just have this thing where I stop doing things for 10 minutes. I have found lying on my bed in the evening looking at the washing moving in the wind on the washing line calming. this helps me to chill out without constantly go, go, go. 

Say no.

Learn the art of saying no because you know what you can because you have a voice and you have that right. Don't feel ashamed because you need to look after yourself. 

Delegate. 

Learn the art of delegating tasks. Focus on the most important ones that need to do. Then if you have completed the less important jobs schedule a different time to do the tasks. Be kind to yourself, Rome wasn't built in a day.

Write down.

Write down things that give you pleasure and that you appreciate it. Allow yourself to enjoy the memories and do something positive for you instead of constantly thinking of what to do next. 

Don't multi-task.

I am one of these people that get caught up doing too many things in one go. I find focusing on one thing at one time much better for me and has better results in the end. 

Sleep.

Sleep is so important and helpful to get a rest and break. Making sure you get enough sleep will help with your overall health. 

Turn off technology. 

Make time aside and turn off technology during the day. It will do you the world of good to have some downtime from the interweb. 

Spend time with friends and family.

It is important to spend time with loved ones because life shouldn't be all about work but also having fun and making memories. 

What kind of things help you to wind down? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below. 

Cheers for reading X 

Why mockups are key to helping move your blog forward. **AD**

Hey readers,

 

As a blogger design is important when it comes to giving a visual idea of who you are and what kind of style of writing you want to offer to your readers.

 

A great way to add personalisation to your blog site or pictures on your posts is by buying digital items called mockups.

 

If you have not heard of the term mock-ups it is basically a design term meaning an arrangement of text or pictures to be printed.

This is a brilliant concept as there many a variety to choose from so you get the ride design for you that is personal to how you want to express yourself.

Of course, mockups can be used in a variety of places, not just in the blogging world. You can use them to place pictures on clothing and give them as gifts. Or you could use them to get designs on clothing to say for a restaurant. You can even place the design on photos. So as you can see mockups are rather flexible in use in a variety of places.

Going back to blogging as I am a blogger and design and visual features are just as important as words.

Where can you get this mockup?

Well, a specially dedicated website called Design Buddles sells  mockup logo target="_blank">mockup logo. They provide a variety of different and affordable packages so you can tailor them to what you need. The type of packages is Graphics, Templates, Mock Ups, Patterns, Illustrations and Craft Files. 

At Design Bundles you can browse over 15, 000 marketplace products. An example of this would be a mockup logo where 20 different types of logos to add on. The type of things would be useful if you are a blogger and you want to see your merchandise you can get the logo on a cup, or sell t-shirts or even business cards that are going to blogging events and want to promote your blog as a professional blogger. 

 

The picture above demonstrates the kind of design for these 20 logo mockups and what it includes is:

* 20 PSD files.

* 20 Mockups.

* Smart objects to place your photos

* High resolution with 300ppi.

* 3000x2000px files.

* ALL DESIGN TEMPLATES IN THE PREVIEWS ARE INCLUDED AND FULLY EDITABLE.

So this is really easy to get professional-looking products to further your investment and growth of a blog. It is really easy to contact the individual who is designing and also it only cost £9.98.

Not only that but the designs are tailed to you and you can download them and edit them if you so which. This, therefore, allows you the choice to get the best design for you and your blog. 

Like I said before mockups don't just help out bloggers but they can expand to any area whether it is you wanting to sell products as a business or even perfect for special days like hen dos and want to have personalised t-shirts. 

Another important point I would like to make is that Design Bundles offer 24/7 technical support online so you don't have to worry if you don't feel confident as there is always somewhere there that can help you tackle any problems that you may occur. 

Cheers for reading X 

This is an ad for Design Bundles. However, all opinions expressed in this post are entirely my own. 

Sensory overload and autism.

Hey readers, 

One of the problems I have is I get overloaded and my mind can't cope with all the information it wants to process.

 This is a big struggle for someone like myself on the autistic spectrum. It is very challenging and hard to deal with at times. 

This post was an idea where I wanted to discuss the impact of sensory overload as a person who is autistic. 

However, the ironic thing is I have been thinking about this post for at least three months beforehand because my head has been spinning as a result of overload. 

I had so my many thoughts that I wanted to write down but it is draughting because of how much there was to process.

I struggle to process thoughts especially when they are fast pasting causing me to stress out.

 I feel overloaded with information and one big thing for me when thinking about how autism affects me is the need for control. 

I am massively swayed to think in black and white and if it is not concrete with regards to my thoughts I find it extremely stressful to manage my thoughts. 

When I feel overloaded I feel at times excited but stressed because I want my thoughts in order and it feels messy.

 I have so many thoughts at times and I want to process them but can't because other thoughts appear.

 I like to take my time and look at the details of the information but when I am juggling these thoughts information gets lost because I can't hold all the information. it is nion impossible. It leads back to not being in control. 

Sensory is a big factor and overload doesn't just deal with thoughts though that is one big trigger for me. 

Another scenario that causes me to feel overwhelmed and the need to want to shut down is when I go shopping.

 My body aches after and when I return home and husband knows not to bother me for a while as I am snappy and need time to wind down.

 Before he used to ask questions and it would really cause me to get stressed out. 

It is mentally exhausting being in a busy environment with people walking in all different directions.

 I struggle with fast movement plus people unintentionally touching you causing me to feel nauseous. 

On top of that, there is space and big spaces and small ones make me feel suffocated.

 If I am in a big Asda store say for example there is humming noises above with the extract fans really hurt my ears. 

The music played in the supermarket is loud and words can cause an emotional response. 

Not to forget I have a need to take in all my environment which is tiring as there is so much to see.

 Then the ultimate thing is the cashier small talk where they ask questions and wait for a reply. 

I have learned to script replies beforehand to respond through new questions occur where I am not prepared. 

I stutter and worry afterward whether I said the right thing. 

I am not good at confidently speaking and saying something off the cuff. It does not come naturally to me.

Afterwards dealing with that over sensory experience leaves me drained because it has taken all my energy to get through the struggles. 

I can feel really dizzy and I need to time to lie down to help get my balance back. 

 So, in just one scenario it all adds up to the pivot point where I am having a sensory overload as there too much information to process. 

I need time and that is what is important to allow me to deal with the feelings and thoughts that I have experienced. I then need to work out how to deal with the information and file it away. 

Ways that have helped me deal with sensory overload. 

1. Learn to accept you can't hold on to everything,  the world won't stop turning because I lose some information. If it is that important I will remember otherwise let it go. 

2. Don't watch programmes that cause me to overthink before bed, I need time to slow down my thoughts. 

3. Know that if it gets too much to have a backup plan. Even if it is just to sit down somewhere quiet away from the busyness for five to give me that rest to then go back and continue if needed.

4. If you are going shopping it can help to write a list of the things you need so you can focus on getting them and then get out. 

Therefore, you don't have to think on the spot nor spend loads of time working out what to do when you are anxious. 

Having a concrete plan also gives you that control and you know what you are doing. 

5. Have sensory toys that suit you so can use if you need to stim or get some sensory seeking done. 

6. Make sure you have snacks (I get low blood sugar levels when I am out for a long time). Also, make sure you have plenty of fluids to keep you hydrated and help think more clearly. 

Cheers for reading X 

6 Ways To Make You Feel More Happier.

Hey readers, 

We all get in a funk from time to time and it can be a struggle to breakdown that negative cycle. So, here are my top 6 ways to help shift your mood to a more happier one. 

1. Distractions. 

It can be hard to get out of snapping out of the negativity because you are constantly feeding it with your thoughts. 

It can be an automatic response to when you feel rubbish to focus on the negatives. That is why sometimes I have found that instead of trying to come up with a solution to the problem use distractions to take my mind off the negative feelings works well.  

Distractions give you something to focus on other than the situation you are in and can help breakdown the negative cycle. It doesn't have to be something big it could be as a simple as walking to the shop buying a newspaper and reading it on a bench. 

2. Breathing. 

A good idea is to take five minutes to lie down somewhere that is quiet and where you won't be distracted with noise etc. 

This allows you that time to focus on breathing. Breathing is brilliant especially with feelings of anxiety and worry. Focusing on using all your diaphragm and lungs is key so you allow your body to adjust and find equilibrium after experiencing a fight or flight response. 

3. Write down. 

Write down how you are feeling on paper. You don't have to worry about spelling but just write free-flowing off the cuff. This can help get your words down and understand more clearly how you feel instead of constantly having the thoughts swimming around in your head. 

4. Thoughts. 

It is so easy when you have low self-esteem to constantly be one's own worst enemy and drag yourself down. Be mindful of what you say to yourself. For example, instead of saying to yourself, 'your crap and won't get the job' swap by saying a positive response to a situation, 'I did my best and that is all that counts, what will be will be'. 

It is so important for your mental health to work on yourself (trust me I know as have had low self-esteem for a number of years and can totally understand how bloody hard work it is). Nevertheless, you can make positive steps forward and I am a big believer of baby steps.  

5. Sleep. 

Sleep is so important in helping clear your head and making sensible decisions. Sleep helps with regulating your emotions. 

I think we have all been there when a tiny thing can cause an irrational response when we are overtired. 

A good tip to invest in is to make sure you turn off electrics an hour before bed and watching or reading something that is calming can really be helpful for settling your mind. 

6. Exercise. 

Exercise is not everything however it can be of benefit with triggering positive hormones such as endorphins that give you that feel-good feeling. You don't even have to go to the gym, you can simply go for a walk for 20 minutes. All these little things add up and have an impact on your mental health. 

What ways help put you in a more happier mood? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section below. 

Cheers for reading X 

My Sunday photo 18/08/2019

Maybe

Hey readers,

I have Asperger's Syndrome, a mild form of autism (though to me it is not mild and it is present every day in my life).

Though there are so many areas to discuss autism today I am going to focus on one thing that affects me and causes great distress at the moment.

 That is the word 'maybe', which by the way I hate it and I hate it in relation to a response to a question. It is covered in grey and makes me stressed, especially when it is a response to a question which I want a definite answer (which 90% of the time).

You see as an autistic person I like control, I like to know what is happening. I love routine it comforts me. Sometimes I admit I get too rigid that I get struck and obsessive making my health deteriorate.

 One of the reasons is because I like black and white, I don't like the murky waters of the unknown. I never have, I feel it is innate and my body responds instantly. 

I can remember as a young child-hating change and uncertainty. I had carers who seemed unpredictable which is not great if you have an autistic mind like myself you get very confused as to what is happening. 

 I was on edge not knowing how someone would respond. I had night terrors because of the fear. That is just one example.

Maybe I will, maybe I won't? but why can't I have a yes or a no? Often, I didn't care, either way, I was more focused on the answer to be certain. I don't like guessing games, I like certainty.

I don't know really what is the point to the point of this post, I just wanted to get it off my chest because right now I am dealing with maybe which quite frankly is most infuriating.

Cheers for reading X

27 things you take for granted before you became a mum

Hey readers,

Sometimes as a mum, you don't get much reward (I am not complaining because this is the life I wanted). However, you never really appreciate your life before you have children until you have children.

Here is a list of some of the kind of things you took for granted before you became a mummy.

1) A lie-in.

2) Going shopping by yourself.

3) Being spontaneous.

4) Only responsible for yourself.

5) Not having to read the same book over and over again.

6) Quietness.

7) Pee in peace.

8) Not having to share anything, haha.

9) Having an adult conversation.

10) You never knew what Peppa Pig was.

11) Having a conversation.

12) Not having to read yourself.

13) Hot drink.

14) Not having your clothes smeared in snot.

15) A Goodnight sleep.

16) Being ill and not doing anything.

17) Reading a book.

18) Having a tidy home.

19) Peace of mind.

20) Running errands without every five minutes having a small human ask are we going home yet.

21) Having a shower.

22) Not being late.

23) Having nice furniture.

24) Personal space.

25) Time.

26) Energy.

27) eating in a restaurant.

Cheers for reading X

34 things to do when sad

Hey readers,

I suffer from depression and sometimes it can be easy to get stuck in feeding into the negative thoughts. What I sometimes find helpful is to stop and do something productive. 

So I have written a list of helpful things (also I go to when complete forget everything).

1.  Read a newspaper.

2. Colour in.

3. Meditation.

4. Go for coffee.

5. Practice handwriting.

6. Go to the shop and buy a magazine.

7. Read a book.

8. Clean (wash up, hoover, put clothes away etc).

9. Shower.

10. Take a walk.

11. Doodle.

12. Mind map - blog ideas etc.

13. A hot cup of tea.

14. Wear a chunky jumper.

15. Cook a recipe.

16. Brush hair/plait hair.

17. Watch mindful videos.

18. Watch something funny.

19. Write some poetry.

20. Play with clay - get creative.

21. Take some photos.

22. Paint nails.

23. Sing a song.

24. Dance your heart out.

25. Walkthrough woodlands.

26. Watch the sun setting.

28. Stroke a furry animal.

30. Light a candle.

31. Watch clouds.

32. Deep breathing.

33. Squeeze a stress ball.

34. Write down three positive things in your life.

Is there something you enjoy that is a great distraction? Love to hear your comments in the comment section. 

Cheers for reading X

My Sunday photo 11/08/2019

The struggle is within

Hey readers,

I don't often discuss my parenting issues in relation to my autism, mainly because I am embarrassed and quite frankly ashamed.

I am going to be straight up and honest and say that I struggle with this parenting thing. 

Let's be more specific as I am aware that actually, I am good at some bits. 

Depression would argue but that it is the truth. However, the one area I do struggle with is mainly with my boys and trying to entertain him for long periods. 

I feel guilty if I can't entertain my children but stuck in a dilemma where I can't concentrate on people for long periods of time, it totally exhausted me. 

I am also an introvert so therefore need time alone to store back my energy. I find interacting exhausting as a lot of the time I am thinking beforehand about how to communicate.

 The times when I am not thinking are when I am being impulsive due to anxiety therefore not censoring and not always saying the right. 

Not really rude, just random and repetitive. Kinda overlaps with ADHD/OCD traits I have learned. I don't have ADHD but with Aspergers there many overlapping traits from other conditions that are apparent. I digress (a major trait of mine right there).

I find it hard to entertain as there are many thought processes that occur and that is tiring. 9 times out of 10 after ten minutes of play I am exhausted mentally.

 I need to do nothing and shut down as I have used all my energy up focusing on that one action that takes many different social rules.

I think one area that is really tough for like me as an autistic living in a technological world (though most of the time it is the dream) I do get sucked into the whole idea of perfect parenting with this idea that you have to entertain your children all the time.

I am one of the few or many not many other autistic people have spoken out in actually I do care what people think and I am very aware of me. 

I am not dissing autistic people that don't give a dame, in actual fact, I admire you and wish I was bloody like that, hell it would so liberating. But I have not reached that acceptance of me.

I wish I could just be laid back, but it seems I am a worrier and feel that because I am an autistic parent I need to make up for my inadequacies.

Cheers for reading X

Introverted parents

Hey readers,

Sometimes I worry that I am not good enough parent simply because I am an introvert. 

I accept I am an introvert and there are some really good qualities that come with that type of personality.

When I look back as a child I saw people judge me because I didn't always have a voice or couldn't find the words to say what I needed to say. I believe that this was a mix of my personality and having autism.

 Communication is not my strongest point. However, I remember feeling bad because it kept getting mentioned. You see some points in my childhood I lived in the care system and there really was a lot of loud children that wanted to be heard.

 I was judged because I was not the status quo and then it made me question am I good enough?! I used to think that because I was quiet and philosophical in the sense I liked to reflect and ponder over things. 

People notice loud people, that is fine it takes all sorts to make the world go round. The problem is at such a young age I interpreted the messages that I was not good enough. Being quiet wasn't good, I wouldn't get anywhere in life because I couldn't form friendships. 

To me communication meant opportunity. I still believe that to some extent. Nonetheless, I have come to accept who I am and that world needs both quiet and loud as they both in their own right carry brilliant attributes.

Sadly, there is also a downside, like everything I guess. Sadly, you can't change who you are, I love quiet time and crave time alone where I can just be left alone to think. When I have time alone it gives me the opportunity to not have to think about the socialising which coincidently my husband thrives off it.

I am lucky in the sense I have a supportive husband that understands my needs and that yes it is selfish but selfish can be good, especially when it keeps the family home life calm.

I find social interaction exhausting with my children at times. I am not saying I hate my children most of the time I enjoy it and find it really fun and amusing. However, it can be really mentally draining for me. 

I suppose it doesn't help that I am autistic as well so uses up a lot more energy trying to read the social situation. I feel like I am constantly trying to work out how to respond correctly. Not to mention my eldest is also autistic and has his own needs on top of everything else.

I think it takes a lot more energy for introverted parents like myself as I spend more time processing emotional stuff and probably overthinking things a bit too much too. 

This can be good but also can be exhausted as it takes it out of you, let's face it generally parenting is hard work so there is not much energy left for much more.

One good aspect of being an introverted parent is the fact that it can be a positive role model in the sense that shows that it is ok to have quiet time and do your own thing. 

It can also teach children that not every moment someone wants noise and that sometimes people need space.

Cheers for reading X

Reasons to consider acupuncture

Hey readers,

If you have never come across acupuncture then I found a brilliant definition cited form the NHS website that I have copied and pasted below to give you an understanding of what acupuncture is. 

Acupuncture is a treatment derived from ancient Chinese medicine. Fine needles are inserted into certain sites of the body for therapeutic and preventative purposes. Acupuncture is often seen as a form of complementary or alternative medicine. Western medical acupuncture is the use of acupuncture following a medical diagnosis. Ir involved stimulating sensory nerves under the skin of the muscles of the body. This results in the body producing natural substances, such as pain-relieving endorphins. It's likely that these naturally released substances are responsible for the beneficial effects experienced with acupuncture. A course of acupuncture usually creates longer-lasting pain relief than when a single treatment is used. 

So, why should you consider giving acupuncture a go? 

Don't be scared to try something new, though it may be deemed not a traditional form of medicine in the Western world does not mean to say it does not work.

practicers that perform acupuncture are often found in GPs surgeries and other places. 

They are trained and have the right qualifications to perform the procedure.

 However, if you are unsure then you can check out the qualifications of a practitioner online at The British Acupuncture Society where the database of qualified practitioners found.

Try it. 

A lot of people say it works, some say it doesn't but at the end of the day you have to try it to see if it is for you. 

People do not respond all in the same way hence why the different treatment works for some and not others. 

Personal. 

Practitioners view individuals personally and see their situation on an individual case, therefore, they will listen to your needs and wants. 

Feel revitalised. 

 Acupuncture has been described by some to help make them feel more revitalised and in a more relaxed state of mind. 

Addictions.

Accuputre has been successful in helping people with addiction issues such as alcohol and drugs. It has helped some people ease their struggle with withdrawal from their addiction.

Cost. 

Acupuncture is affordable when compared to some other treatment such as talking therapy and can have a significant difference in seeing the benefits which can boost your motivation. 

Insomnia. 

Acupuncture has been known to help people improve their sleep and others who struggle with insomnia. 

Acupuncture can help deal with pain management. It can help relax the mind say if someone is suffering from anxiety can induce deeper sleep and less likely to wake up during the night. 

Energy.

Acupuncture has helped people with pain management, given an increase in endorphins which has lifted peoples mood.

 They say that using acupuncture helps give back the energy flow that may be blocked with some diseases, therefore improving peoples health.

Have you tried acupuncture? Love to hear your thoughts in the comment section.

Cheers for reading X 

My Sunday photo 04/08/2019

Anxiety

Hey readers,

As a long-term sufferer from anxiety, I have learned a lot on the way from experiencing anxiety. For one thing, anxiety is the pits!

 At times when feeling anxious, it feels very real especially when your heart is pounding so hard you feel that it may feel out of your body.

Over the years anxiety scared me ironically. I wanted to run away and try to hide from it but if you have ever suffered from anxiety then it will find you and you will be sure made aware of it. If anything running away from the anxiety actually makes it worse in my opinion and the experience I have had of anxiety.

Over the years I have come to one conclusion with anxiety is to accept it for what it is. Ok, it is a regular visitor but it is definitely not a friend because it is not very nice. But accepting it and feeling the feelings is ok, it doesn't make me a failure, which I believed for a very long time.

Accepting the anxiety and knowing that the anxious thoughts are not always true and sometimes my behaviour is just learned from all the years of fear. It is a warped way of protecting myself. 

Now I embrace it, I allow it to come. If I have a panic attack or breakdown in tears I let it come. It is ok and actually, it is so much more manageable than before. 

This mindset has helped. Likewise, with feelings of failure, I know that anxiety is something that may be with me all my life but it doesn't mean I am weak or I give in. I accept it and work with it the best I can at that time.

You have to ride with the anxiety like the waves of the sea. Sometimes I experience anxiety and it can be only a day where I am cribbled with intense dread. 

Other times I go through periods of total exhaustion, tearfulness, panic attacks etc. That is ok. It is ok not to be ok. It is ok not to be superhuman and it is ok to have anxiety. It doesn't make me less of a person. I am not anxiety, anxiety is part of me but there are many more layers to me.

I am still learning about my mental health, it is not easy especially when you are vulnerable and prone to the negativity it can catch you out, anxiety is a bugger like that. 

 But I am with wisdom moving on with anxiety, if it is there it is there but I am not going to run away from it or be scared of it anymore. I think this is one of the most valuable lessons that I have learned in life. I am not superhuman but I can feel and appreciate the feelings. 

They belong to me and I can respond to them anyway I chose. It is my life and the anxiety does not control me, I am the controller of anxiety.

Cheers for reading X

Enough

Don't feel good enough,

Hate me,

Silent tears,

Watching life go on,

Thoughts go back,

Haunting me,

Killing me,

I hope today will pass.

Linger

I'm in a room,

Present,

Then bang I am transported,

Back to the time,

When I was little,

Powerless,

No control,

No voice,

The memories linger on.

Emotions

My Sunday photo 28/07/2019